Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Most Dangerous Airport

I'm always amused by the way our bloggers posted their stories in the net. So much lovely food and exotic traveling pixs with 360 degrees camwhoring poses. Twilight is so different because I gulped down the food when the food plate reached my nose. No time to even dig out my camera as I was often so hungry like ghost. We are so lucky to have multiple choices of menu each day esp in KL where too many eateries have sprouted up. I promise I will blog about food sometimes if not some might look at me like a Spooked Bomoh or Friends of the Pontianak blogger. I kena jaga my muka sikit lah.

In fact, I have got some glutton's food pixs taken at one popular cafe belonging to a Mr. Manhunt finalist. I swear that all his food is Heavenly GOOD! Famous faces hang out at his place too including not-so-famous faces like Twilight. You see, I am a very fussy food glutton, so when I said it's Good, you better believe me that it is fucking Best la! Yum! Yum!
The owner has pestered me to post but I belum mahu buat lagi. I told him to strip to his undies and flash his 6 abs on the dining table so that it will help attract more lalat & diners. Akan datang!

Hey, I have swayed away from my supposedly airport topic lah...

Last night hor, I took out my old passports which included my very own when 11 years old. I could only see Thailand Immigration's rubber stamps on every page and they numbered over several hundreds! My school mates used to call my mum a Thai whore and me a Pimp for traveling so often to Thailand. I just smiled at those morons. One of them have died too, after drowning.

Then hor, I realised that I visited or airport-transited the most was in Hong Kong. The blurry blue rubber stamped word "Kai Tak Airport" hit my head like hammer as I've almost forgotten this unforgettable place lah! Yeah, I asked around and only a tiny number of friends ever landed in Kai Tak Airport which has been closed in 1998. That was 10 years ago!
To my memories, I felt that it was the most exciting yet dangerous airport in the world then. The airport was so small that it was always overcrowded till planes had to run in merry-go-rounds to find a parking lot, just like the basement of Mid Valley wor! Planes bound from Hong Kong were forever late as they could not take off on time - always waiting for their turns! The Hong Kong's unpredictable typhoon and frequent strong wind further scared the pilots' balls until kena jammed inside their pants!

I loved the thrill when the planes were landing in the middle of Kowloon! They will sweep past all the hundreds of tall office buildings and flats in Tsimshatsui where some Fei Phor were just hanging their super elephant sized underwears on the balconies! As a kid, I thought they were white starched pillow cases!

In one minute, you could see averagely 3 planes landing & 4 taking off during the peak hours! Very Exciting isn't it? Hello, it was so damn noisy to me alright.

My 4th uncle who was a Singapore Airlines pilot hated landing at Kai Tak airport as it was so tension & he had to precisely get the plane's tyres out at the runway's tip by the sea otherwise the plane would have the wrong timing to run along the small airport. Surprisingly, very few planes crashed into the sea! The gila pilots blindly landed before the runway like Gila Babi or the typhoon blew the plane off!

Every night, you could see hundreds of primary school kids doing their homework or studies inside the Kai Tak Airport's corridors or cafeterias. Their homes lined beside the airport's runway, so the noisy planes were killing their studies! I have stopped complaining when I heard the rare noise of bastards speeding their kap-chai motors near my condo at midnight. Amazing that Hong Kong folks were so tolerant, not by choice! Their new big airport at Chek Lap Kok in Lantau Island is a great blessing!

So many fortunate bloggers like you have landed & camwhored in the current world's biggest airport in Beijing. I had only seen their old airport which looked like an old warehouse. For your info, the next world's biggest airport in the making is in Dubai!

To me, the most disappointingly old & confusing airports are the London's Heathrow and the Kennedy Airport in New York City. They were built before we were born, so what do you expect? Anyways, once I saw a very thin & long ugly plane that scared my ass out at Heathrow's runway. OMG! I screamed wildly when I realised it was a Concorde aircraft! Stupid Twilight, hee hee!

The world's craziest one was the O'Hare Airport in Chicago where they filmed "Home Alone Part 1" as I also got lost inside the long terminals like actor Macaulay Culkin. It was so packed with human sardines that I was being bodily-molested and dragged all over by the Mat Sallehs. I could have easily climaxed whilst holding my luggage. Today, Chicago & London are still fighting for 1st placing as World's Busiest airport.

Statue of cowboy John Wayne standing outside the airport.

Lastly, the most interesting & unique was John Wayne Airport in Santa Ana, California. I was heading to Anaheim's Disneyland which is just close by. Well, that whole airport is an Art Gallery & Museum inside, so it was ngam with my interests! So unusual concept lah!

I am sure you guys who are well travelled bloggers could offer me some valuable advice which is the dirtiest or best shopping airports that you had landed. I am sure TZ has much African stories to share about Kampala airport!

Good tips - buy lost luggage insurance and misplace your bags! The claims are unbelievable! I had never done that but I often heard about the shopping spree they were entitled. Have you done that Perky?

Happy Flying!


  1. Have always avoided Heathrow by all means and I have always loved Schipol airport, Amsterdam.

  2. Cathay sure have lots of brave pilots... i had my transit at HK new airport about 5 years ago... for airport shopping, i will prefer HK airport...specially for branded fashion and acceseries...

  3. talking about airport....there is one airport really scary one.

    the airport is in california fitness....if u ever go there, you will see a very manly female...she is so airport that no pilot in the world dare to land on it..!!


  4. Ah...now i miss travelling. Only been to Thailand this year. Airport...I think LA airport is very busy as well. And yeah, Dubai airport was busy especially at midnight. And tell you what, I've experienced a delayed luggage once..damn bad luck.

  5. jz dun fly with the same plane with Osama~

  6. Nase - Amsterdam airport? How nice! I heard they serve coffee with weed to get high. I wanna try!

    Jason - I think the old Bangkok Don Muang airport was a great shopping hub. My mum voted Dubai, but I've not been there!

    Airport Viewer - Muahahaha! I know you're talking about that female cycling trainer! She looked like ironing board on bicycle!

    sbanboy - Buy insurance?!

    KEENYEE - Bangkok airport is closed again and that should be the real Most Dangerous Airport.
    LA airport is always busy till now. I have not landed in Dubai yet. Need to wrap in veil?

    kenlin - I read articles from all over the world about astrologers predicted Osama's fate. Another JFK sequel?

  7. haha~ will it hit the building ???

  8. I think LCCT in the list of the world most dirtiest airport, even the new PUDU bus station also better than LCCT.

    Airasia, now everyone can puked!

  9. Pheewwittt…
    Pudu got new bus station?

  10. Kenlin,

    Not new but new look...though they already renovated...

  11. LeuMaS - Ha Ha! They never hit any walls but often the clothes lines got blown away. The plane was so close to the flats that you could see the programmes on their TVs.

    Daniel Ng - LCCT is dirtiest? I'm really surprised lah! I would agree that it looks shabby & low class. I thought the owners wanted to tear down Puduraya & relocate. I will ask kenlin to follow me there to take a look.

    Kenlin - Wanna go check out the new facelift at Puduraya?

  12. i going back hometown this saturday by bus at puduraya. i will try experience d new surroundings and write u a report abt it.

  13. Kai Tak,ahhhh fond memories. Tried in-Kai Tak, out-Chek Lap Kok thingy, was a disaster coz the new airport had bad baggage delay.

    Best airport to shop ~ Dubai.

    Least fav ~ Moscow airport.

    Fav airports ~ Honolulu & Koh Samui (juz like a quaint lil' resort)

    Dirtiest airports ~ China domestic airports (>5 yrs ago). Take ur pick!

  14. This airport in Penang has a huge plot of cemetary at the end of the runway. While i was working there we have to cross to the other side of the runway erly in the morning at 5am. Its really spookey, at times all my hair would stand for no reasons. yee...

  15. kenlin - Take care & be nice to your momma! And don't forget to bring food freebies from your hometown too.

    anton - You so fortunate to "in & out" both airports at one trip! Was it planned that way? So Dubai is still everyone's fav shopping haven. I will definitely plan a Dubai stopover next year!
    My parents got their luggages looted in Moscow too!

    Stephanie - I didn't know there's a cemetery by the runway! Is it a Muslim cemetery?? Wooooooo!
    The cinemas have more ghosts than mortuary and cemeteries! It is in one's mind to feel spooky.

  16. Yup, the in-out was planned. I kinda have a thing for airports and planes. Used to memorize names of airlines and their logos when i was a laddie. Visited KLIA a few times even while it was under construction. :)

  17. So far, touch wood, I've never lost any luggage when travelling. The only thing I've ever lost was my fav teddy bear when getting off the plane in Dubai (tertinggal in the plane).

    I'll be going to Perth for Xmas. Hmm... i better buy that lost luggage insurance. Matilah aku kalau my presents go missing.

  18. The dirtiest airport is LCCT Kuala Lumpur.

    I have only travelled a fraction compared to you so I have nothing to say.

    Have not landed in Kai Tak before because in 1998 I was only a secondary school boy and at that time, my furthest holiday was just 200km from home, which is KL..

    Don Muang was like a crappy eerie terminal with no people at daytime and packed to hell at midnight..

    Survanabhumi.. well.. yeah, ok, no comment.. Chep Lap Kok, too big to explore finish cos was rushing for the AE bus..

    And locally, Penang Airport is too cramped.. Senai airport is nothing larger than a refurbished old warehouse..

    KLIA.. hmm.. a drop in standard due to some people..

    And perhaps the ugliest is still LCCT..

  19. phuket airport is like penang airport.. nothing much grand..

  20. I did my transit in Dubai few years back to Tehran. It was midnight and indeed still a very busy airport it was. Wrap in veil? Hehe, let me know if you happens to do it someday.

  21. Anton - Every laddie was like you. First, I memorized all the countries in my stamps and the currencies of countries. Now memorizing mantras by hard instead coz I've been a devil once.

    Perky - You're like a hot stewardess, flying everywhere so often! Hmm, I've not seen Perth yet. Blog when you come back ya! Happy holidays & get drunk Perky!

    Takashi - 200km from KL, you must be an Ipoh boy? I'm wondering why everyone is saying LCCT is dirtiest though I would agree it's ugliest. Must ask Dato Tony Fernandes to clean it up. Thanks for coming Takashi!

    KEENYEE - Yo!!! How lucky you went to Tehran! Went to look for brides? A while ago, I was emailing with the former Empress Farah Diba of Iran who is now exiled in Massachusetts. She is not lucky like you. I helped to promote her memoir book of the late Shah, that's how we corresponded.

  22. Thank you TZ for yr kind words on my blog. I appreciate that.

  23. The more dangerous the runway, the more vigilant the pilots are = less accidents?

  24. I see the planes are flying dangerously close to the buildings. Kinda scare me because it reminds me of the horrible 911 terrorist attacks.

  25. Bengbeng - If mere words could offer much comfort, I would be happy to do so. You are such a good son any mum would be proud of!

    William - You're man of few words yet often wise ones! I totally agree that the dangerous runways toughened the pilots a lot. My uncle said so too.

    mannpriedo - It was very scary yet interesting as you could see the TV programs running inside the HKG flats from your plane's window. It was that close! I might blog about 911 as I took some WTC's photos from its roof top deck which had miles of Manhattan's view. Thanks for coming dude! I'm curious about you since Fable knows you by hard.

  26. All the people stay beside the Kai Tak airport must be very scared last time. Worry if any plane will crash on their building.

    The current Hong Kong airport is so damn huge and walking from immigration counter to waiting lounge can make you slim down.

  27. i got heard from my dad that those old times HK airport is really near the houses as well ... when i heard that ... i feel impossible lah ... but after i watched those old times HK movie ... is really near and low as well lol ... so dangerous larrr ... no more safety lol ... but now ... have a nice and perfect airport ... really very nice lol ...

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