Wednesday, December 10, 2008

A Really Haunted House

I have a friend who is a retired bachelor and lives alone in a huge condo at Kelana Jaya. He converted his 4 room condo into a single room bachelor's pad overlooking a nice PJ view. Every year, he would habitually go alone on back-packing travels in overseas like 7 months in total. All his life he has been a rather weird antique collector and filled his whole house with only antique furnitures, vases, collectibles and statues. Only his kitchen uses modern day cabinets & washing machine. I have terrible phobia to enter his house whenever he called me over. I have no problem walking in a cemetery alone at night but not his house! His whole condo unit is filled with sad and weird ghosts who were mostly past owners of all the old antiques in his house. 
EEEeeeeeee! So damn eerie and all my head & pubic hair are standing upright now!

The wandering ghosts were too attached to those old antique wares and would still cling to them until TODAY! Whenever I visited him, I would have to chant mantras non stop otherwise the football field of spirits would bite and suck my frequency hungrily as no one offers them food and prayers for over a hundred years. The ghosts would murmur all sorts of noise everywhere like really hungry and desperate ghosts calling you.

Yesterday morning, I went over to fetch this weird and grumpy friend to the airport at 4.30am as he was flying off to India. He never allowed me to shoot any photos of his place no matter how I begged, so I just used my mobile phone! He is very rich but lives inside this dark haunted place with poorly lit small lamps! So my photos are so damn shit Blurr, no matter how I photoshop the sharpness & brightness. Forgive me yeah but at least I am sharing a real haunted place in this blog.

The dark entrance into his unit on the 14th floor. He changed all the entrance doors with some ancient shophouse's sliding wooden door! He hung a matching big wooden sign with carved gold letters in Chinese. His front is so different from the neighbours because he is gila.

He prefers to use a one speed old cranky fan which was made in Germany before WW2.

This is his tea parlour where he would occasionally entertain. Guests would sip hot oolong tea using antique pots and cups.

He has many floor to ceiling shelves displaying few hundreds of antique Chinese female artisan statues and animal figurines backdating to the Ming and Tang dynasties! They all cost a big bomb today. He would buy same pattern in dozens like one shelf displayed over a dozen of exact Laughing Buddhas and birds! What's the reason he has to collect so many exact pieces? He is really Siau Lang as I have pointed out.

This is his drawing room where he paints calligraphy and relax on his favourite Manchu's canvas deck chair. These corner pieces were mostly produced before the fall of Ching dynasty, judging from the typical scholar outlook of Emperor Puyi's era . I know some antique details as I had to study bloody Art History before in the States. I bloody hated that subject lah and copied during exams! Ha ha ha!

I am pretty sure my friend is the incarnation of an old Chinese Empress or bitchy mouthed concubine as he has all the mannerism like one, with harshest flaming mouth like the Empress Dowager. He could even cleverly arrange this long Rosewood Pearl inlaid bench with gold leafed screen standing behind and flanked by 2 Ming Dynasty vases holding 100 peacock feathers! This is similarly to how Empress Dowager CiXi arranged her corner inside the Summer Palace in Chengde, China.

He stores all his clothes and boxers inside the many trunks and beautifully carved Rosewood chest of drawers.

This is the most horrifying poster bed where he sleeps at night. It's all bloody RED COLOUR from the bed sheets, blankets to the hanging drapes and wall. This is very bad and any Feng Shui master would agree to this as unsuitable colour choice to sleep. I am sure the hungry vampires suck all his chi and energy at night, making him so ill tempered like a slut bitch.

This is the Opium Bed which is too dark to be seen but many ghosts are always lying on it still inhaling pipes of imaginary opium. I never liked to stand near this opium bed. This is the only dwelling place with the most wandering spirits I had ever encountered and blame it on my friend for inviting them! It is not a wise idea to collect too many old antiques at home.

I went home that night, too tired to cross over gold paper flames to cleanse the following ghosts clinging to my clothes and body. As a result, I had a very bad nightmare that burglars stole my passport & money. I just cried so hard in my dreams as I would be traveling this Friday. I woke up in disbelief that my passport and cash are still with me! Yippeee!

I will smoke my whole house tonight with the Tibetan weed incense and the spirits would leave.


  1. The pics of the place looked so eerie, you'd expect to find a corpse lying around somewhere.


  2. Whoa! So freaking rich to deck up a haunted place. I don't think I dare to venture into his lair, scary alright. creepy!

  3. i'm a great fan of chinese antique -but yet to afford it laa...someday, maybe-

    but this house is DAMN gloomy!! u can arrange antiques without having the eerie effect u know...

    no wonder u had a nightmare!!

  4. I still prefer the story on the hunted place at 41 floor. :) More interesting :P

  5. OMG! really freaky! it's the most suitable place to make ghost movie! XP

  6. Really scary le that house. But thanks for letting us know that there is someone who like those antique thingy so much. I think the worst is the bed, couldn't imagine myself sleeping on it every night. Ee...

  7. Well, at least it's not dull like those apartment that looked like a page out of Ikea catalogue~

    Though the lighting~ Urgh! does it have to be this dark and dim and gloomy?? I love bright lights even when having sex! No DIM LIGHTING! absolutely scary~

  8. that bedroom and that opium bed!! OMG!! i really have problem staying in such decorated places.. that's why i hate those antique hotel rooms (or those culturally decorated ones) so i rather choose contemporary hotel..

  9. Firstly, it's absolutely extremely spooky even by just looking at the photos you took. My uncle loves antiques too but his house is not that dim and dark as your friend's. Why does your friend make his place so dark? No wonder it invites "those" thing.

    On another note, you said you hated the Art History subject and copied in exams. I love history and would always get 'A' for it. I cried once when I was late and missed the History test during Form 4. It was only a monthly test. Hahaha!!!

  10. Looks like the interior design circa 1940s.

    How retro!

    Let's hope there's a maid to clean up the place regularly.

    ... cos my verification word = bersin!


  11. I am not a big fan of antiques but I do find the people who are into them interesting.

    I like the apt but I agree with you about the bed don't look very restful but eerie since it is such a old bed I cannot help but think how many people have died in that bed and to be sleeping in it now....

  12. oh my god... My furture home will definitely not in this way! is too creepy! i once sleep on the bed with red color fitted sheet, and i tell u, i cant sleep well at all! Red is definitely not a good color for bed!!!

  13. all i can say is you did a fucking good job using photoshop. this pl creeps.. i would rather live in the cemetery.

    anyway i found yr blog while looking for someone with same interest in the Lee Kuan Yew Memoirs. interestingly, we are the only two..

  14. Gosh! so freaky and creepy!

    He is rich but if he happy?

  15. the house look so eerie...and give me the creeps. it would be fun to overnight there rather than paying money to enter haunted house at the fun park.

  16. Anton - My friend is as good as a walking corpse himself. Got enough ghosts lying about in his pad to scare me.

    Nase - When you've no choice like me, you get immune to ghosts eventually. If you follow me, you might be able to see many shadows I am sure.

    AJ - I also love Chinese antiques very much. My friend is nuts and arrange in bizarre & spooky looking manner. No taste lah he..

    Lifebook - Where got 41 Floors? You watched too much Japanese ghost stories laaah..

    vincent - Good idea, I will propose to some film directors next time.

    KEENYEE - I am so particular on bedsheet colours as they have Feng Shui effect. Too much blue also bad and I might drown in the water. Red colour can cause cancer in the long run.

    Fable - I thought making love in candle lights is superb lah! Funny hor you like bright lights. Try the Stadium Merdeka...

    SK - I so happen to like real traditional hotels like those in Cambodia and Bali. So spooky and relaxing. You got no guts guar...

    Calvin - This Art History is fucking boring compared to normal history lah. Art History have to memorize hundreds of paintings, the names of painters and date & place they painted. Some more why they painted the damn art pieces! So you think you will love it??? Yiiaaakks!

    Joshua - No matter when a place is decorated with antiques, it will look like 1940 or 1840. My friend is definitely a concubine from "Raise The Red Lanterns" episodes.

    sgboy - I also thought exactly that how many people had screwed and died on that bed as it has survived over 100 years!

    E.T. - Aiyoh you must have let the pontinak suck you that night on the red bed. Your white slippers still got fly away?.... LOL

    A Common S'porean - I didn't do good photoshop la. My camera captured so blurr shots in damn dim lights. I admire Lee Kuan Yew and even attended his memoir book launch at Suntech. If our PM was like him, I think our currency is higher than Euro by now. Thanks for visiting, we should be good advertising buddies!

    Daniel - My friend is rich, grumpy, bad tempered, fun loving, sissy and runs like a grandma!

    Weejino - What a brilliant idea that I should organise a spooky tour for bloggers to see his house since he is often away. I can make big bucks from gate collection and ask the real ghosts to all volunteer that day... Ha ha ha!

  17. i feel that i had oledi go into the temple in the dark night lol ... so horrible le ... i really scare hauted house ... better ask more friends go together if really got chance to enter the hauted house lol ... haha ...

  18. Just want to say THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING. I truly enjoy your stories.Keep up the great work!

  19. O M G the bed..... Eeeeek... Super creepy

  20. OMG, you're HILARIOUS!!! loved reading this. and thanks for attempting to take pics even when the bulk of them are really low-res..

    if your friend has such bad attitude, why are you friends? lol.

  21. this guy is a gay i feel


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