Monday, May 16, 2016

Bad Parenting On The Rise

Yesterday, I went to the nearby supermarket in my neighbourhood to do my grocery. It was a Sunday and it would always be packed with regular shoppers. I disliked the big crowd always as I often encountered problems to navigate my mini trolley along the aisle. Most of the familiar faces are those well heeled lazy aunties who would bring along their maids just to push trolleys. Occasionally you might see some noisy small kids running around too, knocking into the people and shelves until the displayed items fell off. Some parents would apologize and snapped at their kids. Some parents would transform into blind bats and ignored their own kids by pretending to look elsewhere!!




I had a real fright of my life when my trolley reached the end of the aisle to get some toilet rolls. This boy was rolling and tossing on the floor singing away his lullabies. My eyes went wide and my mouth opened big with dropped jaws. The boy continued to kick and toss, pulling down more boxes of tissues to do his monkey acts. I walked near him and was very horrified! His mother was just beside him, looking at some labels & instructions on the bottles! Kaneeneh! What kind of mother is that?? I think this mother needed help and not the kid.

I freaked out and walked back few steps to snap this photo. My heart was thanking my late mother so much that I was brought up very well under the thumbs of her very strict Thai manners. She trained me & siblings so well that she hardly used a cane. All she needed was cringe her eyebrows fiercely with the most scary eyes at me. I would be frozen into ice cube, numbed and behaved properly at once! Muahahahaha!

I may not have kids but I know that parenting doesn't come with a handbook. It's all on-the-job training as the kids come into their families. No given guidelines, just lots of unwritten rules that restrict who our children think they want to be. Every parent would dream to turn their children into grown ups with responsible, successful and independent traits. Parenting isn't just a job, it's a lifelong commitment.

One expert has pointed out - " If you want to change someone else's behavior, the best place to start is by changing yours"... It really makes sense to me to adopt this at work as my staff are like my helpless kids sometimes.


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40 comments:

  1. This is a well-thought post. Parents have the most sacred role to play in shaping the future of their children. I have loved your idea. Thanks for sharing. I am sure it would certainly inspire some of the parents.

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    1. Yes it is not easy to be parents. I am thankful to my parents always.

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  2. I often relate the behaviour of the child whether inside the classroom or out to the upbringing of the parents. It shows, esp that I deal with young children. There are many factors why children misbehave but there is no excuse for a parent not to look into the problem.

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    1. I can understand the roles of teachers after having seen how my wife had to pull her hair on seeing the crazy students she had. The list was endless and very sad at times.

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  3. Did the mum realised that you took the picture of her kid?

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    1. She would have grabbed my phone if she saw me.

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  4. Perhaps this child is a special needs child such as having one form of autism or borderline autism or Aspergers Syndrome. Children with autism look normal on the outside with normal appearance but their behaviour is very different.

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    1. I also had thought he might be an autism child and definitely not a retarded or Down's Synd. To me, whatever the child could be, the parent should not allow the kid to roll on the dirty floor and block the aisle junction. I didn;t elaborate more about the damages on the many boxes and the kid got up later to catch up with the parent who had no qualms. If the child had special needs, do you think it was alright to let him roll? Anyways this is common but I just didn;t see it for a long time, so it shocked me a bit.

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    2. It is very difficult to control a child of special needs. That is why sometimes you read in the news of special needs child being locked up in a room at home like an animal which is not the right thing to do but the parents cannot control them so lock them up lah. I volunteered in an autism center before and it is very difficult to communicate with children with autism unless one has spent years to create a bond with them.

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  5. Yeah, Mun may be right, this child might be kind of special.. Anyway, kind of sad when we come across situation like this..

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    1. Yes I always feel very sad to see kids who terribly misbehaved. My wife had taught and lectured at private schools & university where I received many unbelievable shocks from many students today. I could only blame their parents in most cases.

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  6. For me, my tolerance level depends. Sometimes when you go to less "atas" places and see such naughty kids, but when you look at the parents who obviously look like they are struggling just to make ends meet, then maybe I am more tolerable. Bad karma notwithstanding, if they have to work all day and night just to put food on the table and roof over the head, then the kids gets less attention in unavoidable.

    But if I see a rolling and/or shouting kid in, say, Cold Storage or Mercato, where the mom has a maid to push her trolley, well then... yeah, f**k! I would wish the mom would roll down a mountain instead!

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    1. LOLOL You damn horrid to curse the mum to roll down a mountain. Wakakaka
      I agree that one's karma would sometimes shape their lives and family lifestyles. It is not easy to have equality in this world but sometimes when we see ignorant parents, it could make us shudder. Just hope for the best.

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  7. Well said, Anay. I can't help to agree with you. It is the parents' fault. Whatever happen on a kid, it is always the
    parents are to be blamed. No one else. We, as a parent, is the first teacher, is the role model of our own child.

    Always, at home I think my daughters are the naughtiest child on earth. But, when I compare them with others, then i know they are somehow better behaved than them a lot. No choice, me is a devil mom - fast and furious. Hehehehe!

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    1. Hey both your Princesses are angels and role model kids! Every parent would dream to have your kids who excel in sports, studies and good behaviour. The gold medal goes to their good mama! So fast they have grown up into teenagers soon. By then, you will have more time for your exercises and activities. You have done your Fast & Furious style very well. The results are great!

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  8. Yannie, agree with you on that. We parents have a duty to teach our children proper manner...even now when my kids are older, I still correct them.

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    1. We salute all you mothers who have brought up all your children well to become good citizens of the world.

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  9. I wonder if that kid is a special needs child to behave like that. Even so, the mum ought to have kept him in check or not bring him along (maybe no choice). I do agree with you that parenting skills are practically non-existent these days. I can write a long story on that. I almost always encounter poor forms of behavior from kids when I go out shopping. I wonder how our society will turn put when these kids are all grown up and become our future leaders!

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    1. Won't that be nice if you could share a long story about all the encounters you had? You will be surprised that such topics attract lots of readership from worldwide. I am not discriminating but such things still happen today and frequently too. It may not be easy to solve these issues.

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  10. LOL too embarrassed to say, yours truly might be one of the spoilt kids too

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    1. You still roll on the floors today? Muahahaha
      What a spoilt brat! Hey I thought you have gone to visit the Kim Chi Farms in South Korea.

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  11. Young toddlers and kids like to copy others so they learn the bad behaviours from others especially from their parents lol

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    1. You are correct. Kids also imitate the parents including using harsh languages.

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  12. You are lucky the mother did not see you take picture of her kid! Otherwise she would act like the kid and throw tantrum! LOL!!

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    1. Muahahaha! Mother and son roll on the floor together!

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  13. The kid was singing and not throwing tantrum? Maybe he was darn bored having to tag along shopping the entire day already and was just entertaining himself. Macam kat rumah dah hence he was rolling away?

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    1. I was baffled as the kid looked very normal to me when he walked elsewhere with his mum. People are getting gila sometimes.

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  14. I really wish to see how's the parents look like to have a child like this =.=" Sometimes I saw kid rolling on the floor too (not at supermarket but mall) & the parents seem like not really care regarding their kid's weird behavior >_<

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    1. I am very sure you would never allow your pretty daughter to roll on the floor inside a supermarket! LOL.
      This is what I really could not understand with that boy's mum.

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  15. Why stop at snapping photo only ? Should have laser he mom la.

    Am not a good parent but if i beh tahan i will kaser the parent.like the time the too clever father who put his toddler on the escalator hand railing to ride as horsey. Laser him kao kao

    Wah... how i wish i know how you mom can make you freeze at the raise of an eyebrow. If me ..i think i will need botox to keep my eyebrow permenantly raised. My kid also no scare liao.

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    1. Hoiii!! I mana berani laser the mum. She will scream sexual harassment at me. LOLOL

      My mum was strict with us from Day 01 and told me she was poor till I reached teenage life! By then, I was already thrifty and well behaved by her threats. Later years, I only found out that my mum is not a strict woman at all. She just wanted to discipline us well and she succeeded.

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    2. laser aje la.... not ask you to smack her mah LOL

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  16. Can't imagine if my son's like that. This is definitely bad parenting!

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    1. You are so classy, super clean and hygienic person. You probably only allow him to roll on his bed at home. If he ever rolls on the floor, Shirley will be in the whole Singapore's "BREAKING NEWS"... Wakakaka

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  17. I ever encountered during my years of teaching, a boy spitted on me and his mother even sided him and her boy bragged that he sit in First Class Movie Seats when he went for movie, to think that he is only Primary Two at that time, what a spoilt brat

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    1. OMG!!! How could that rascal boy spit at you?? I would have slapped him hard. I have seen many rotten kids too. They are rotten products rolled out from rotten parents. LOLOL

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  18. I believe parenting is toughest job in the world... because bringing up a kid excels in moral isn’t easiest. First parents have to prepare themselves being a responsible people to allow their kids and other to follow. They aren’t bring up their own, but creating an environment where many from the future generations will follow.

    Very sorry for the kid to behave like this in public...

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    1. What you said is so true. It is a tough job to become good parents as they often got carried away. I noticed that the kids from different countries behave differently. I guess it must have some cultural and religious influence sometimes.

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